Pain and Providence

I’m always at a 7/10 on the pain scale. But when flare ups hit, I’m in trouble. That’s when the pain flares up.🤣Just in case there’s any reader out there like me. I used to think it meant that the disease the person was referring to comes to life. But in some cases, it means it becomes a horrible monster as opposed to a raging beast.

That’s where I am. Have been since I think Wednesday when my husband said I’m walking like I need a wheelchair. The pain tablets..no combination of them has brought any relief at all. Nothing. I feel NOTHING. No reduction in pain at all. Just my bones screaming. My bones are behaving badly when I do my exercises too. It’s as if there’s a sudden fast decline this week. Better stop now. I still want to drive etc!

As for injection side effects? 24 hours of heartburn , feeling full after eating only a few bites, nausea… At least if I had side effects AND pain reduction, I’d feel better mentally.

Nothing. I’m lying on my back. This used to help reduce the pain. No can do. I can’t focus on reading my Bible.

Flare ups stink.

Mr Arthritis follower, how are YOU doing today? I hope you’re resting from suffering!

This is not a good Sabbath. Let’s hope next one will be better. And if you’re where I am-let’s keep holding on just a little while longer. Maybe the next treatment attempt will bring relief.🙏🏾

But, I almost forgot the gifts Providence has provided me.

I asked my son to take photos for a vlog I want to post on where I am with this disease. My sweet angel insisted that she stop her lunch and “do what Mommy is doing!”

She even took time to reassure her sister who had been overseeing her eating, “Don’t worry! I’ll be back! I just want to copy Mommy.”🤣

My youngest blessing, her twin sister… I don’t know. I don’t know if it’s the classical music that research shows has made improvements in the brains of neurodiverse children; I don’t know if it’s the supplements research has shown help (in much higher doses than we can afford. But I figure less is better than none.) I don’t know if it’s because of specific efforts to engage in speech and for her to watch the videos I make; or if it’s natural progress. But my last born has been talking up a storm.

Well, a storm compared to her “non- speaking” days! And within a few days she’s even modified her speech to be more ‘correct.’ From pulling our hands and asking for “some grapes,” she changed it to “want grapes.” If she doesn’t see what she is looking for, she names it. Remember the frustration for me as Mom when I didn’t know what she wanted? And her reaction to the word “No” is so much better. The whole world no longer knows when she’s upset with us.😊

There’s a lot we don’t yet understand about her behaviour. She only had maybe five things she can ask for-for now!! A lot that perplexes and frustrates. I’m still sad that I can’t do her hair and she can’t even handle it being washed-resulting in some funky smells and a need to shave it off. But we all rejoice in the speech that’s coming despite us putting pressure on her. It’s a huge blessing.